Hello, hello, hello! It's great to be back here at the Raymond Report to entertain you with some hilarious stories and jokes.
You know, I recently started taking yoga classes. I always thought it was just a bunch of stretching, but it turns out there's a lot of breathing involved. It's like a workout for your lungs.
And speaking of workouts, I went to the gym the other day and saw a guy lifting weights with his feet. I guess he wanted to get a leg up on the competition.
And here are my top three one-liner jokes:
- I'm reading a book on anti-gravity. It's impossible to put down.
- I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised.
- Did you hear about the Italian chef who died? He pasta way.
Moving on, have you ever noticed how weird some food combinations are? Like, who was the first person to think, “Hey, I'll put cheese on this apple pie”? But then again, I guess it works for pizza.
And finally, I'll leave you with this joke: Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field.
Thanks for tuning in, folks. I'll be back next time with more hilarious stories and one-liners. Same time, same place, and same title!